Transform Social Anxiety Disorder

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The last technique I'd like to share with you is a method of channeling nervous or anxious energies into other forms. Before we start, I'd like for you to grab a pen and write a list of the possible negative outcomes that could result IF YOU CONTINUE AVOIDING SOCIAL SITUATIONS FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE. For example:

• If I let my social anxiety disorder prevent me from interacting, then I may not be able to achieve the type of life I desire (or find my soulmate, or make good friends).
• If I let my social anxiety disorder prevent me from public speaking, I may not be able to finish school (or get promoted at work, or find success that I probably deserve just as much as anyone else).

Now, imagine that there may in fact be people in this world that will judge you, put you down, insult you, make fun of you, people who are hoping that you'll fail -- basically, imagine that there are people who will unleash on you everything you fear socially, such as rejection, embarrassment, failure, and so on. How does that make you feel? If it makes you feel ANGRY, then GOOD! Should you care at all about such people and what they think? NO! With this thought in mind, I'd like you to close your eyes and try self-generating a bit of anger for anyone who dares to treat you in such a lousy way. Really feel a sense of disgust for such people. Imagine that their judgment might very well have prevented you from achieving the life you desire. Next time you're interacting with someone from whom you sense any sort of belittling attitude, experiment with this exercise. Force yourself to feel a little mad and hostile on the inside, as you interact calmly, confidently, and deliberately on the outside. Nervousness and anxiety are simply our instinctual "fight or flight" responses. This time, you'll fight. Transform your nervous energy into mental aggression.

Although this exercise is a bit "negative" and "hostile" in nature, it's a good place to BEGIN learning how to transform your nervous energy into more proactive forms. Until you're able to overcome social anxiety, realize that there is a very real possibility that your fears will prevent you from getting where you want to be in life. So let yourself feel a little angry instead.

With time, as you get more comfortable with your energies, you can experiment with transforming your nervous energy into something more positive. For example, write a list of all the possible positive outcomes that could result from your social interactions:

• By engaging in more social interactions, I'll be more likely to find good friends (or find a good job, or find my soulmate, or make more sales).
• By embracing social anxiety, I will be confronting one of my greatest fears and will become a stronger person.

These are just some examples. Whatever the possibilities are for you, how do those possibilities make you feel? Excited? Great! Excitement is closely related to nervousness (think about it, one person goes on a roller coaster and is full of fear while the other is full of excitement - however, the sensations within both these people are actual quite similar). Try engaging in social interactions while keeping those positive expectations about socializing in mind. Think of every person as a possibility - a new friend, a new business contact, a new love, whatever. You'll soon be channeling your nervousness into a sensation of excitement, joy, or some other type of positive energy.

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